Adventures With Cassiopaea

Chapter 31

Many people think that all psychopaths are dangerous criminals like Ted Bundy or John Wayne Gacy, and this is due to the fact that the only psychopaths we know about are criminals. The important point to make here is that all criminals are not psychopaths, and it seems to be so that most psychopaths are not adjudicated criminals. The facts seem to be that the only ones who ever get studied are the ones who "less successful," shall we say, and who therefore get caught and incarcerated. The really GOOD ones aren't in prison. And that ought to scare us to death! It is very difficult to estimate the numbers of true psychopaths in the population, but one thing seems certain, the numbers are increasing rapidly.

In spite of more than a century of clinical study and speculation and several decades of scientific research, the mystery of the psychopath still remains. Some recent developments have provided us with new insights into the nature of this disturbing disorder, and its borders are becoming more defined. But the fact is, compared with other major clinical disorders, little systematic research has been devoted to psychopathy, even though it is responsible for far more social distress and disruption than all other psychiatric disorders combined. [Hare]

That is a startling statement - that psychopaths have a more detrimental effect on our society than all other psychiatric disorders COMBINED. And so few people are even aware of this fact. They may know all about schizophrenia, or bipolar disorders, or ADHD or whatever, because all of those things can be medicated and controlled to one extent or another. Also, they are disabling to the individual. Conversely, the chief thing about psychopathy is that it is not disabling to the individual unless certain other factors are present. In general, psychopaths always manage to do very well for themselves. People ask: "Isn't psychopathy maladaptive?" And the terrifying answer is: It may be maladaptive for society, but it is adaptive for the psychopaths themselves.

The hallmark of the psychopath is a stunning lack of conscience and their objective is self-gratification at the expense of others. Psychopaths are possessed of a cold, calculating rationality combined with an inability to even conceive of others as thinking, feeling beings. To witness such incomprehensible behavior produces a feeling of bewilderment and helplessness. What is important, however, is that most of us never "witness" such an "inside" view unless we have been burned a sufficient number of times to develop an acute awareness that all is not as it seems on the surface. To actually identify one of these people, we must become very, very aware, and make certain "tests" of behavior - systematic harassment, as Don Juan calls it - of those we suspect may not have our best interests at heart because their acts don't match their words. Through such tests, psychopaths can be "flushed out" into the open, fully displaying their true nature. However, even when in full display, most people simply cannot believe what they are seeing. Only the victims know the truth, and their insights are generally discounted as we will see.

[G]ood people are rarely suspicious: they cannot imagine others doing the things they themselves are incapable of doing; usually they accept the undramatic solution as the correct one, and let matters rest there. Then too, the normal are inclined to visualize the [psychopath] as one who's as monstrous in appearance as he is in mind, which is about as far from the truth as one could ell get… These monsters of real life usually looked and behaved in a more normal manner than their actually normal brothers and sisters; they presented a more convincing picture of virtue than virtue presented of itself - just as the wax rosebud or the plastic peach seemed more perfect to the eye, more what the mind thought a rosebud or a peach should be, than the imperfect original from which it had been modeled. [William March, The bad Seed]

Only by reading the literature on the subject can the average person truly begin to grasp the nightmare of living with or dealing with a true psychopath. Lying, deceiving, and manipulation are their natural talents. They have vivid imaginations that are focused entirely on themselves and getting what they want, and they are unbelievably unconcerned with the possibility - or, in some cases, certainty - of being found out. When caught in a lie, or challenged with the truth, they are almost never embarrassed at all! They simply shift the attention of the questioner, change the story or rework the facts to be more consistent with the original lie. The end result is that the listener is confused, and they are then vulnerable to being convinced that the confusion is their own fault!

Psychopaths also tell lies that are so liberally sprinkled with emotional trigger words that the listener is completely taken in. Even sophisticated psychologists and psychiatrists are very often hornswoggled by psychopaths! One case cited by Hare is really funny in a horrible sort of way because the psychologist wrote about the subject such things as: "very impressive; sincere and forthright; possesses good interpersonal skills; intelligent and articulate," and so on. He was later humiliated to discover that virtually none of what was told to him by the psychopath was true. He had fallen for every word, hook line and sinker!

Studying their use of words conveying emotion is revealing. As Sylvia Nasar wrote about John Nash:

But, as in so many other relationships in his life, Nash's intentions weren't' always matched by the emotional means to carry them out satisfactorily. Even as he tried to draw his son closer, he said and did things that could only be called insensitive and alienating. […] [At present] The self-deprecating humor suggests greater self-awareness. The straight-from-the-heart talk with friends about sadness, pleasure and attachment suggests a wider range of emotional experiences. The daily effort to give others their due, and to recognize their right to ask this of him, bespeaks a very different man from the often cold and arrogant youth. [Nasar]

What we surmise from the above is that now that he is old and finds that he must look to others to survive, Nash has again "adapted" like the true psychopath. Psychopaths very often talk at great length about their "feelings" and they claim to experience strong emotions. However, a careful listener or interrogator will discover, if they are clever in their questioning, that the psychopath is unable to describe the subtleties of various emotional states. They will equate love with sexual arousal, or sadness with frustration. The conclusion of researchers is that the emotions of the psychopath are so shallow as to be little more than "proto-emotions," or primitive responses to self centered needs.

For "normal people," it is our awareness of emotional consequences - fear of being hurt or of hurting someone else - that guides our choices of actions in life. The "inner voice" that tells us "how things are done" when one is involved with other beings who have rights and feelings is developed via a complex system of socialization. We can call this our conscience. It acts as a sort of "inner policeman" to regulate our behavior even in the absence of external controls. It is a sort of inner self that presents a series of perceptions about what others expect of us, as well as what we expect of ourselves. Psychopaths do not seem to have this "inner guidance" system. They may calculate coldly what may or may not happen, but they act primarily based on achieving immediate satisfaction, pleasure, or relief of some sort.

Please note: the psychopath does not act based on a consideration of the rights and feelings of others. They do NOT have a conscience. And it is OUR conscience that makes us prey! It is OUR perception of THEM as human beings with feelings, that restrains our actions, that makes us "consider" them in the way WE would like to be considered, all the while, they are not so constrained! In terms of Game Theory, they have a Dominant Strategy that takes into account this very weakness of conscience that they KNOW will prevent their victims from responding in kind.

Psychopaths consider the rules and expectations of society to be inconvenient and unreasonable impediments to what they want or need. But, as noted, they don't always break the law so as to land in jail. They are generally too smart for that. Instead, they do things that are unethical, immoral and harmful to others in ways that are not illegal. The problem with behavior of this sort is that it is cruelly destructive to all around them, but it is almost impossible to document or explain to outsiders.

Obligations and commitments mean nothing to the psychopath. They don't honor formal or implied commitments to people, organizations, or even principles. They are also irresponsible parents. They may insist that they love their children, but typically, they will leave them for extended periods of time either alone, or with unreliable or inappropriate people. The story of Nash's behavior toward his mistress, with whom he had a child that he suggested she ought to "give up for adoption," as well as his son by his wife, who went for a year without a name, and who was shuttled back and forth between his mother and his grandparents for most of his life, demonstrate clearly that Nash most definitely was not merely an "irresponsible parent," he was cruelly neglectful. Of course, the excuse is made that he was psychotic. But it is most curious that his psychosis began just shortly before the birth of his second son, within a marriage, where societal expectations of care and responsibility would be most likely brought to bear on him. It was almost as if the very idea of actually being expected to give something of himself to another human being was sufficient to drive him to self-destruction.

Nash suggested to Eleanor that she give John David up for adoption. […] It was a cold-blooded suggestion, and it all but killed any remaining love Eleanor felt for Nash. One only hopes that among Nash's consideration in putting it forward - apart from eliminating any financial responsibility he might face for his child, which prompted Eleanor to say that Nash "wanted everything for nothing" - might have been a genuine belief that John David's chances in life would be greater with some middle-class couple than with his single, working mother. […] He doubtless behaved selfishly, even callously. His son and others later attributed his acknowledgment of paternity and desire to maintain a bond, even while failing to protect his child from poverty and periodic separation from his mother, to a pure narcissism. [Nasar]

We note above that Nash obviously was saying the words, but they were contradicted by his actions. One of the signs of the psychopath.

Psychopaths are extraordinarily successful in talking their way out of trouble. They will say over and over again "I've learned my lesson," or "you have my word that it won't happen again," or "it was all just a big misunderstanding, can't we forget it and go forward?" Usually this works, and one wonders how many times it had worked for Nash before he found an instance in which it did NOT work and, in fact, ended in the withdrawal of his top-secret security clearance and loss of a lucrative consulting contract.

Continue to page 276

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