Article - Laura Knight-Jadczyk
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Article - Laura Knight-Jadczyk
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Chapter 22
When considering how to deal with Frank, we discussed whether or not we ought to just tell him how we felt, what we had noticed, and why we were concerned. We agreed that this would be the most logical thing to do since it would give him a chance to "explain" himself, or to adjust, if possible. So, we decided that we would try to approach the subject a little at a time and gauge his reaction before going the next step. I tried to talk to him about it, and soon found that there was no way possible to do it. Every approach to the subject that I tried, he blocked with his sympathy ploys, resurrection of his suicide ideas, and general energy draining tactics. In short, he was poking a stick in my eye, and I was trying to politely ask him to remove it. And when he began to manipulatively assert his right to poke a stick in my eye, I subsided and withdrew my request. At the same time this was transpiring, the website was growing, and the correspondence was increasing. I was finding myself spending almost every waking moment answering questions from readers, and this usually involved having to research the subjects they were asking about and quoting the long pieces of text that I would find, along with further information on the subject from the C's. At this point, the answer of how to deal with Frank became apparent: there was no way we could do the research, get the material posted, and be drained every week at the session. So, we just simply informed Frank when he called and asked if we wanted to do a session that we had decided to cut back to one session a month in order to have time for research and handling the questions of the readers of the website. We thought that we could "balance" things by allowing Frank only limited opportunities to poke the stick in our eyes. Yes, I know, that is really stupid, but there it was. That was the program, and that is what we are all taught to do: to compromise, to see Free Will as a sort of balance of permitting the Free Will choice of another to abuse you to continue, but only occasionally! I continued to want to give Frank opportunities to contribute out of a sort of despairing hope that we were wrong. I would print letters from readers with questions and ask him to do a little research, or write a reply. His uncaring attitude about other human beings in difficulty, people who were writing and asking for help, repeatedly shocked me. I continued to ask him to write a bio for the site. Every month throughout 1999 when we had our monthly session, I would ask him: "Did you get your bio written?" And he never did. At one point, I even thought that I would give the "who is receiving the C's" question a sort of "blind trial." I asked Frank to please begin to experiment with channeling on his own, to write his results, that I would type them up and post them. He never did. This went on, month after month in the background of 1999. Now, I want to go back for a moment to the "used soap" session of January 2, 1999. This comment was made in reference to our thought that a Nobel Prize might provide the necessary cachet to enable us to do the research that the C's were urging, to share our results widely, and not worry so much about either money or attack. We had the idea that we must always fund everything we did ourselves, and that the only true "sharing" was if we could just give everything away for free. So, in order to be able to make enough money to do this, we decided that increase of income potential ratio per hour was advisable. That way, Ark could work fewer hours for the necessary money,to provide enough for us to live on, maintain the website, buy all the books and materials we needed, and maybe even pay someone to help us with keeping track of everything. He would then have free time for the research itself instead of spending every waking moment trying to meet company deadlines in order to keep the bills paid. It was pretty obvious by this time that we were not going to get the help we needed from Frank, and Terry and Jan had already bought their longed for home in Tallahassee and had opened their dreamed about antique business. Jan finished the job of formatting the transcripts through 1998, but at this point, they were too busy to continue to give the time to the material that it required. I was swamped with the work, Ark was swamped with his work just to keep the bills paid, and keep me in books and materials needed to deal with the research questions from readers. We wanted to be able to make the material available to as wide an audience as possible, and that required money. A lot of money. We did not want to try to publish the material through a regular publishing house where some whacked-out editor who didn't have a clue would cut the C's to ribbons. We wanted to make any printed copies available at cost, and we knew that in order to do this, we would have to make more money, make it faster, and have more time to do all the editing and clean-up work on the transcripts that was needed. It was an enormous job, and we were simply overwhelmed. And we weren't getting any help from Frank. He wouldn't even go over the text and correct spelling errors or add personal notes. As I read through the "used soap" session, I see that there is another very strange remark:
Again we are faced with a conundrum. This was not the first warning to be careful not to share too much, too widely. Such warnings are scattered throughout the text. Yet, at the present time, Frank has declared that he is The Channel, and has illegally issued permission to Maynerd Most to freely publish and distribute the unedited transcripts, in direct contradiction of what he has claimed to channel! There is also the odd remark that the material would not be a "pathway to fame and fortune unless and until it is balanced." This remark is especially strange since neither Ark nor I had any ideas of "fame and fortune" for any reason at all other than to be able to better perform our perceived mission of researching hyperdimensional realities, and sharing the C's material and whatever research we had that contributed to the expansion of knowledge. The reader ought to know that, for both of us, interacting with the public is an act of service that constitutes a form of conscious suffering which, all things being equal, we would certainly choose to do otherwise.
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